I sometimes feel entrenched within a feeling of loss which leads to anxiety which, in turn, promotes a nocturnal and sometimes rather unhappy existence. However unpleasant it is, I believe that it is one of the reasons that I have the compulsion to create. Perhaps it is an attempt at reclamation. I think that many people can understand such a feeling though differ widely in the way that they reach their own understanding of it.
It is easy to become seduced by our emotions and in turn become enslaved by our own desires. This emotion and desire can, with determination and self-discipline, be turned outwards and used to create. If this self-centeredness and self-flagellation is maintained and harboured internally it can lead only to harm. Harm against ones happiness and ones sanity. It is nothing but self-destructive.
It is important to realise that emotion has no absolute and can become manifest in a plethora of highly individual outpourings. Emotion is measured and felt relatively. For example; a child could be torn apart by the loss of his favourite stick while a mother grieves the loss of her family in some freak accident. Their grief and unhappiness could quite sincerely be felt simultaneously by both the boy and the mother with the same intensity.
Consider the next time you criticise an artist for being narcissistic. He or she is perhaps simply trying to purge him/herself of the things that hurt them in the past. They just happen to do it publicly. Artists of all sorts are easy targets in a society that at large is not encouraged to express its emotions.
EXPRESSION not SUPRESSION!
"Its victim behaves like a rooster and cries like a dog, the patient wanders among the tombs at night, his eyes are dark, his mouth is dry, the patient hardly ever recovers and the disease is heriditary."
- Ali ibn Abbas al-Majusi
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